My 100th Post

Not to be confused with my 100th blog written...because there are about 30 unpublished posts in my draft box.  My brain works on overtime but sometimes those thoughts are not publish worthy.  Trust me.  Unless you are a licensed therapist, you dont even want to open that bag of worms.  So what is on my mind these days?  Oh so much.  But after a marathon reading session that ended at 2:15 this morning of Eat, Pray, Love, I am strongly strectching the brain muscles this morning.  I am letting things go, relaxing the "Adaptaion" voices that talk back and forth, out of turn, rudely interrupting one another. 

With all that said, I am starting a new path.  (I do this occasionally.)  I gave up meat last week.  Not just red meat this time but pork and chicken.  I ended on quite a high note mind you--with Paul (soon to be Uncle Paul) breaking in the new Green Egg on some of the best Backyard BBQ ribs EVER!  Fish is still on the menu for now.  Not going straight vegan.  I might go into a coma if I had to give up dairy.  Besides with soy/tofu NOT on my list of edible I need my cheese and eggs.  I really have no major reason I can give you for this new path this time.  It was not because of my Animal Science class tour of the Meat Science Lab at A&M this time.  It was not because I had to use a bell scraper on a pig carcass this time.  It was not because I had to watch video of cow being processed this time.  It was not because I had a front row seat to the actual sausage making steps this time.  It was not a dire step to get my weight to under 110 this time.  (Not looking for that number any more) It was not to prove any kind of humane point this time. 

It is just because I decided to do it.  And oddly I don't even think about it, no craving, no "I wish", no crabby mood.  I am sure it won't last forever-the no meat thing not the no crabby mood part.  Just giving it a try.  We will see...

Anyway, lots more new things going on in the Arnold House with my career shift.  More on that later.  We are adjusting better than I thought we would.  And of course the new paycheck doesn't hurt.  I can say that after all these years and all that Zanex I am getting pretty good at flying "drug-free"!  Guess laying down those control issues that you never really had control of anyway has it's perks! 

Where did my baby go?

Everyone says little girls are so fun because you can dress them up like a baby doll.  No one tells you that you can do the same thing with baby boys!  And boy oh boy did I.  Have you seen all the photos of my boys in smocking and bubble suits?  What about the velvet overalls at Christmas?  Or Bradford's red silk Christmas shortalls he wore when he met Santa(see below).  Nothing is sweeter than a toddler in knee socks.  I always say they have their whole life to dress like a grandpa or a Frat Daddy!  Why do it at 9 months?  I remember one day Brandon came home and I showed off some pictures I had taken of Bradford.  After viewing all of them Brandon noted the many different outfits Bradford was wering in all the pics.  He asked, "Did you play dress up with him?"  Of course!

With all that said Bradford has drawn a line in the sand.  He is NOT wearing anything that remotely looks like a baby?  "Mom I don't want to wear that one anymore.  You can give it to Berk." If I am not careful he may even give up his preppy look too soon for me too. 

The icing on the cake was when he showed up at his first T-Ball practice this week in a striped Polo t-shirt and Gap shorts.  In NO uncertain terms we WILL be buying basketball shorts, "daddy socks" (the no show athletic socks Dad wears to the gym) and "work-out" shirts.  All per my 4-almost 5 year old!  No fancy clothes please for practice anymore.  It all started with his hair last year.  "Mom this is how I want my hair cut..." Next it will be "Mom this is where I want to go to college..."

blubber blubber

I logged onto a friend's blog for an update on her miscarriage grief tonight.  Then after clicking on blog after blog link, I now can hardly see from all the tears.  I know I know, Brandon reminds me frequently I should not watch the news because it makes me so sad.  Well I am thinking the same goes for sad blogs.  Actually my sweet husband just checked on me again and said to please stop reading those.  But you know when you understand someone's grief so profoundly you feel like you owe it to them to support them even if only by "listening" to them spill their hearts out via blogging.  So if ever you need a friend to lend an ear sometimes blogging can the best answer we have to offer.  I believe the only way to grieve a loss like this is to Grieve Outloud.  Every face of loss also has a face of hope.  Many prayers and hugs to you all tonight...Love,